Todays Changing Families Essay Example for Free

Todays Changing Families Essay Introduction   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Parents play a crucial role in almost every aspect of a child’s development, especially because they are the first people who get to teach them basic knowledge from the time of their birth. They are the ones who teach them, or at least, helped them learn, basic skills such as walking, speaking, and other things that they can use for the development of other skills. Aside from directly teaching or training them to these basic skills, the presence of the parents also contributes to the child’s emotional state. Parents who give their children their full attention would be a factor for to the child’s happiness, usually resulting to children who are generally more lively and expressive of their own feelings. The emotional state of a child is extremely important to give time to because it ripples almost to all the other areas of the child’s life. It affects the child’s motivation to do other things, including the manner by which he or she deals and intereacts with peers. Lack of proper nurturing may result in an unhappy child and may develop in other behavior problems. In recent years, depression in children, from infants to pre-schoolers, had been recognized as a clinical disorder similar to depression in adults. This can be characterized by a child’s lack of facial expression, temper problems, frequent tantrums, and other symptoms. Usually, this condition arises because of the lack of time devoted by the parents for their children. Another reason could be various family problems that can even prove to be traumatic to a child’s memory, resulting to fears and other behavior problems. Family problems are commonly attributed to conflicts between parents for different   reasons. These conflicts may develop into bigger and chronic relationship problems that could lead to divorce and separation whose unpleasant effects would fall on the child, as such problems would render the important development stages unattended to. This is to add to other traumatic experiences that the child may experience along the process. Not only quarrels between parents can affect the child’s emotional state. When both parents are working, they may not be able to spend quality time with their children. Usually working parents seeks the help of caretakers during the day which would take the place of the nurturing that should have come from the parents. There are available daycare schools that offers this services, but it is argued that the development of a child is still better handled by his or her own parents. Parents who work during the day most probably would not get to know their children well, as they are not physically involved in taking care of the child, and this proximity plays an important role in the development of their relationship. When a child is inflicted with depression, it can manifest in different ways. Usually this would come in the form of tantrums or anger, and would try to get the parents’ attention as much he or she could. The child would try harder to do get their attention when the parents do not give it already, but when they child was still not able to get the attention he or she wants, the child may give up and go to a state where the child distances himself from the parents. This is considered as the children’s defense mechanism against the possible future emotional pain that can be inflicted once the attachment grows and the parent does not give enough attention to the child. Quality time as an important factor Spending time with children is vital in order to achieve a healthy relationship between parents and their children. This will not be possible if the parents themselves are not ready to parenting life, or are just plainly immature to handle the responsibilities that being a parent entails. Raising children requires a lot of time and sacrifices for both parents and should be very well planned as part of family development. Some even consider parenting as a career choice and deems it necessary to choose between a job and being a parent. Quality time could be difficult to come by when both parents are busy doing their own jobs. As such, the relationship between parent and child may not be well enough for a healthy growth of the child, as it could end up as the child feeling unloved and neglected. Usually the parents try to compensate their lack of time by rewarding the child with material things, but it is only a matter of time before the child realizes that it’s not really what he or she wants. These are the cases in which the parents may not know a lot about the child’s personal life, even when the child has grown to an adult, as personal involvement was not encouraged nor practiced. Also, when both parents are too preoccupied with their own concerns against each other, such as feelings of jealousy and anger out of his or her partner, they may both end up neglecting the social and emotional needs of their child. Coupled with traumatic quarrels, this may well mark to the child’s memory and something he or she does not want to look back on. Effects of Divorce Usually the main issues during during events of divorce are the differences between the parents. But the effects of divorce to a child’s mentality is different, and would require a close inspaction. Divorce needs to be viewed as a permanent condition that goes far beyond the issues about custody and arrangements between their parents. During a study, it is found out that children who had divorced parents got into drugs and alcohol. Also, it was found out that these children have the fear of intimacy and generally became loners. Aside from this, it is revealed that one-third of these children finished only up to high school education. Role of parents with the child’s education   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   Since the parents are considered the first teachers of their children, they play vital role in the schooling of the child. It had been studied that the involvement of parents with school activities greatly improves the children’s learning abilities. In this regard, schools are encouraged to foster and maintain activities involving the parents of the students. These activities includes family days where the parents would visit the school for a gathering and get to know the other parents of the students. Also, some schools have associations for teachers and parents that serve as a venue to air concerns and suggestions as how to improve the leadning processes of the school.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚   This is true for all levels, including elementary, high school and university. Activities are not limited to those inside the school as parent-involvement through helping in school work taken at home can also help. Aside from it creating a bond between the child and the parents, it helps in the child’s education. During times that the parents visit the school, it is vital that they get to communicate with the teachers so they can form an understanding and assessment as to how a child had been doing. This way, any problems can be discussed and addressed accordingly. References CBC News. (May 4, 2004) Fewer Canadian marriages end in divorce. Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2004/05/04/divorce040504.html Child Development Institute. Research Shows Parent Involvement in Education Important To Student Success. Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/ Divorce Law FYI. What is Divorce? Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.divorcelawfyi.com/ Divorce Magazine. Divorce Statistics. Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.divorcemag.com/statistics/statsUS.shtml Divorce Source Website. Stark Legacy of Pain for Kids of Divorce. Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.divorcesource.com/CA/ARTICLES/starky.html Madison Libraries. Children of Divorce Research Guide. Retrieved February 27, 2008, from http://www.college.library.wisc.edu/research_guides/childdivorce.shtml